Loser of the Week (Week 11)

POSTED BY Robert Reid, 13 November 2007

IT'S NOT COLLEGE FOOTBALL'S TEAMS, OR PLAYERS, OR COACHES, OR UNVERSITIES THAT LOSE — IT'S US, THE BIG, DUMB, STUPID FANS

As the topsy-turvy 2007 college football season starts to wind down, brace yourself for the annual explosion of angst, bitchiness, negativity and outright ill will. It’s all because college football is the most irrational sports system in the world.

Oh, I love the game. But no other league has as many teams playing as few games, with no playoffs to determine a champion. Any mathematician would tell you our system doesn’t add up; 119 teams playing 12 or 13 games is ‘too short a field’ for a couple championship contenders to cleanly separate from the pack in a way all can accept. While no baseball fan doubts that the over-achiever Colorado Rockies deserved their slot in the World Series this year, or that Chicago Bears deserved to play the Super Bowl, or Ohio State the basketball championship… many many fans show fresh rage that Florida State (not Miami) played in the 2000 college football championship, Nebraska (not Oregon) played for the 2001 championship, Oklahoma or LSU played (not USC) played for 2003, Oklahoma (not Auburn) played for 2004, Florida (not Michigan) played for 2006.

It’s fashionable to knock the BCS system — but the problem is older than JoPa. Let's not forget that before the BCS, BYU won a national championship in a pre-Christmas bowl after having never played a ranked team. In the '40s and '50s champions were crowned before a bowl game. Some champs (eg Tennessee, Maryland, Oklahoma) got beat in a bowl game, but still stand as champ.

Other sports can debate bad coaching calls, or slip ups on the field. College football fans talk about bureaucracy.

We college football fans are rarely satisfied watching just our team play. So, we lash out against other conferences. Teams that our team will never play. If the shocker Big East front-runner Connecticut loses big, it's indicative (to Big 12, SEC and Pac 10 fans) that the entire Big East is weak. This is because we cheer the losses of a team that would be a feel-good story in college basketball — like Connecticut or South Florida or Kansas. Out of self interest. We grow increasingly cross-eyed as the season wears on: putting one eye on the other games (like upcoming key ones: Missouri/Kansas, LSU/Arkansas, Oregon/UCLA, Oklahoma/Texas Tech) and the other on our own team’s game. We complain and complain about style points, or the lack of, or point differentials, or strength-of-schedule, or whether fourth-quarter comebacks are more 'telling of champion qualities' than a less exciting domination.

This is more like gymnastics. Maybe college football needs judges?

Meanwhile, this week fans of Duck, Sooner, LSU Tiger, Jayhawk, Missouri Tiger, Mountaineer nations rose in delight on Saturday. Not because of their team's play, but because unpaid athletes in Columbus, Ohio, fell seven points short in their game.

We are scavengers. But it's not us, it's the system.

Compare college football with other leagues:

• Pro baseball: 30 MLB teams play 162 games, and eight teams (or 27% of the league) go to the World Series playoffs.
• Pro basketball: 30 NBA teams play 82 games, and 16 teams (53%) advance to the playoffs.
• Pro football: 32 NFL teams play 16 games, and 12 teams (38%) advance to playoffs to reach the Super Bowl.
• Pro hockey: 30 NHL teams play 82 games, 16 teams (53%) advance to the Stanley Cup playoffs.
• Pro soccer: 13 MLS teams play 30 games, eight teams (62%!) advance to the playoffs.
• College basketball: 336 NCAA teams play about 32 or so games, 64 teams (19%) advance to the basketball championship tourney.
• College football: 119 teams play 11 to 13 games, and just two teams (1.7%) play in the lone championship game. No playoffs.

In all other sports here, it's impossible to argue against a team that makes a championship game. It's all performance.

If we continue to be playoff-free, perhaps college football's champion should be determined by the model of the English Premier League, which has 20 football (soccer) teams that play 38 games (each team twice) with no playoffs? At the end of the regular season, champions are unceremoniously determined by points (three points per win, one point per tie) — ties are broken by goal differential and goals scored. If still equal (and this has never happened), ties are broken by a neutral site match.

How would that look for college football? Here's our current top-six, using the Premier model, favoring point-differential as a tie-breaker:

1. Kansas – 30 points (10-0; 459 pts scored, +310 differential)
2. Oklahoma – 27 points (9-1; 450 pts, +282)
3. LSU – 27 points (9-1; 393 pts, +226)
4. Missouri – 27 points (9-1; 418 pts, +197)
5. West Virginia (8-1; 364 pts, +214)
6. Oregon (8-1; 385 pts, +187)

Meanwhile, our playoff-free system isn't just unsatisfying. It breeds negativity. Once your team loses — that is, if you’re hoping for a chance in the championship — the season becomes less about your team, but more about other teams' failures.

What a pity.

Yes, week eleven was another wild one. A number-one team fell at home to an unranked team (Ohio State to Illinois). A team fronted by toothed birds pushed a top-five contender until late in the fourth (Louisville losing late at West Virginia). The game of the week was Tuesday at Kalamazoo's Waldo Stadium, 3-7 West Michigan put up 24 in a wild fourth, and threw eight laterals to get to the Central Michigan 20-yard-line as time expired – yet lost by four. A couple teams losing their coaches this year (Nebraska, Texas A&M) played well in victory (Neb’s 73 points against Kansas State) and defeat (A&M’s pushing top-five Mizzou deep into the fourth).

But that’s just ordinary losing. Now that the last push for New Orleans' snappily named 'BCS Championship' is full-on, college football’s ultimate loser is now clear.

LOSER OF THE WEEK (LoW): College Football Fans.

LoW SUGGESTIONS:
1. Introduce [altogether now] eight-team playoff. BCS poll would determine the eight best teams. Conference winners don’t automatically qualify. Other top 25 or 30 teams could play in bowl system, a la college basketball's NIT.
2. Helmet-to-helmet penalties = ejection. Washington's Jake Locker was knocked into an ambulance Saturday, the same day the NFL instituted the wise rule suggested here. When’s the last time you’ve even seen a helmet-on-helmet hit penalized in college ball (that includes that often-shown USC out-of-bounds knock-down of the UCLA quarterback from last year)?
3. No more 'he'll be playing on Sundays.' If you mean a player will go pro, say just that. College football already plays on Sunday (if you didn't notice), as well as on Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday.
4. Stop the hate. Brothers! Sisters! Please!

LOSER OF THE WEEK ARCHIVE

Week 10 The entire state of Florida is put on trial.

Week 9 The official Loser of the Week two-point conversion chart.

Week 8 The Curse of beating the Loser of the Week.

Week 7 Risks of men not wearing a ponytail.

Week 6 Sweet moustache and TV.

Week 5 Picking Buckeyes, thanking god.

Week 4 Things to do in Tulsa.

Week 3 The world's greatest piece of art (in Canada).