The Sports Randomizer
-Texas / Oklahoma football rivalry leads to castration. Of a fan. In a bar. By another fan. Seriously.
-Andy Rooney provides a cogent example of why people shouldn't ramble publicly about things they don't know anything about. In his case, sports. Because apparently in Andy Rooney's head, all modern baseball players are named Rodriguez and American football is too complicated for the rest of the world. Way to compare the collective IQ of the rest of the world to a child, Andy.
-Vick's dad told him to stop dogfighting, and Vick didn't listen. You mean a professional athlete didn't listen to logical, reasonable advice and did what they wanted anyway? How shocking.
-There will be a four-way fight-off for the right to fight Wladimir Klitschko. This just in: modern boxing still irrelevant and boring.
-The Miami Heat are not interested in Ron Artest. Apparently they don't need a player to cover the camera-destroying, fan-punching aspect of the game.
